I’ve sat by, watching the world pass me last year.   Everyone was lauding some sort of imaginary recovery.  A world where people aren’t wage slaves, and people like me are lucky to find an open position in any job so we can gain any form of experience.  A world where banks aren’t still perpetrating the actions that gained them such a negative portrait. This, the same world that politicians are more than happy to embrace people who are tired of obeying, all the while lining their pockets with the money of those who will make sure that they’ll be kept obedient.

The same world where a federal reserve bank continues to act under the delusion that their policy is making a resounding difference, and not lining the pockets of the wealthy. A world where lawyers and banks willingly exploit people who have to constantly work to make enough to keep the lights on.  The lawyers and bank that say that we had no good reason to be present at a hearing they filed a motion for and failed to notify us of.

The same world, where an abusive father willfully tortures his family emotionally because the world isn’t fair to him.  Where he will go out of his way to complain how a certain subset of people, real or imaginary, is conspiring against him.  Where he will continue to insist that his youngest daughter is a whore/slut/bitch/cunt/dike/thief for ever telling him he’s wrong.  Where he willfully allows the bank to manipulate the situation to foreclose on our house. The abusive father that relentlessly undermines whatever attempt at keeping the place you grew to love and call home, just so he can say the, “man,” is keeping him down.  The same father that refused his son treatment for his extreme anxiety disorder because of his fear of how others would perceive him.  The father that threatened to tell everyone his son is insane if his son revealed to the world how abusive and negligent he is.  All the while he willingly claims him when he’s trying to squeeze out sympathy from whomever he hasn’t decided to hate yet.

This world, where my mom is scolded for not being a proper secretary/maid/cook all the while having to support the household with my eldest sister and grandparents attempting to help.  Where she tirelessly works to make sure the house isn’t falling apart around us.  Where she tries to keep up with the bills and stave off a bank hell bent on foreclosing on us.

And then there’s me, in this world that doesn’t care.  Trying to get a job, with no experience, while people shout at me to get a job.  After finally getting a job, everybody tells me to mind my own business while the world falls apart around me.  I’m trying to save the house from the bank and a complete sociopath who’s only interest in you is the Munchhausen-like exploitation of you wherein he derives so much pleasure. I don’t want to lose my home.

The place that was there for me, to call home, when the entire world was collapsing around me.  The place that allowed me to find refuge when nobody cared about me.  the place that my niece finds refuge and peace from hectic life that my sister and her husband lead.  The house that my grandparents where able to rely on when my grandfather was diagnosed with prostate cancer and we couldn’t afford for all of his care.

Please, in the name that all that is good on this Earth, whatever is left, help me.  I want to be able to celebrate Christmas in my home with my caring family.

We have until December 3rd. for reference here’s the case number of the foreclosure in Lake County Circuit Court in Illinois : 13CH00001350